#WeekendCoffeeShare – 12/31/16


If we were having coffee, I’d invite you into my sitting room. It’s a chilly, grey day here in Virginia, but the heater is on and the room is cozy warm. I’d offer you some espresso or Earl Grey tea and some little tarts that I made. There’s lemon, chocolate, pumpkin spice and coconut, my favorite.

If we were having coffee, I’d wish you a Happy New Year and tell you how grateful I am that 2016 is over. For a year that started off with so much potential, it sure turned south very quickly. Everything seemed fine for me until late April, early May. I started to get depressed over some stupid stuff with a friend and by June, I became suicidal and ended up hospitalized for a few days. Of course, the docs there medicated me and I couldn’t concentrate to write again until October, and only by taking myself off the meds. The US Presidential election in Nov bummed me out in a major way. I’d been a Bernie supporter and was appalled at how he’d been treated. I did cast my vote for Hillary, but reluctantly. I am definitely not okay with Trump as our upcoming President, but I am not going to allow him to upend 2017 for me.

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you how excited I am for 2017 to begin. Not only will I be working on my health this year, but I will also be taking some online writing courses to help with my fiction writing. I do have a few writing projects for this upcoming year – Horror Tales in February, another Jack Diamond story, another Rayne Fallon story, and possibly another Astraeus story near the end of the year. I am really hoping that the writing courses will help me improve my storytelling. I plan on editing those previous three stories above later this year too. If I can figure out all the hows, I may put all of my novellas on Adobe .pdf and offer them for free. I think it would be easier for people to read them in their entirety in one place instead of on my blog.

And finally, if we were having coffee, I’d wish you a safe trip home. I’d pack a few tarts for you and your family and bid you a fond farewell until next weekend.

Dear readers, I’d love to hear about your week. How did your Christmas go? What are your hopes for 2017? Any major plans coming up for you? Leave me a comment. Much love!

This Weekend Coffee Share has been brought to you by Part-Time Monster and Friends


Monthly Wrap-Up: December 2016

December was a relatively quiet month for me here on WordPress, but I do have some things to share.

I finished my paranormal mystery Seeing You early in December. It was supposed to have been completed at the end of November, but my health prevented that.

I’ve also continued working with Keith Channing on the science fiction serial, Zanzibar. It is slated to continue into 2017.

I had no plans to start any new writing projects until February 2017, but my randy muse, Catharine, had other plans. I began Andromeda Dreaming, a YA science fiction story, on December 16th and it will be completed at the end of March.

Here on ATFWHI, I’ve just been doing some journal writing and catching up on Challenges. Expect more of the same throughout 2017.

Christmas weekend was okay. I had few expectations going into it. We don’t do much for Christmas except cooking and eating. We did plenty of that. My sister did finally come down two days after Christmas, very late in the evening. I wasn’t sure she would arrive at all. She’s like that – says she is coming by and then not show up or even call. But she arrived. It was a nice visit. I still haven’t seen my niece (sister’s daughter) or great-nieces in a while, since September to be exact. The last time I saw any of my brother’s kids and grandkids was early summer. They didn’t even call for Christmas. We are such an estranged family. Speaking of estranged, the estranged one bought me a Nutri-Bullet and an external dvd drive for Christmas. They were lovely gifts and much appreciated. He wouldn’t let me buy him anything. He knows how strained my finances are.

Well, that’s my December wrap-up. See you next month!

How about you, dear readers? How was your December? Did you do anything exciting? Writing projects? How was your Yule/Christmas/Hanukkah? Let me know in comments.

#WeekendCoffeeShare – 12/11/16


If we were having coffee, I’d invite you into the warm kitchen for brunch. We’d have a slice of south west quiche, a dish I learned from a lovely Mexican family when I lived in Oklahoma, and cups of Finca las Granadinas, a delicious coffee from Honduras. There’s a delicate balance between the spiciness of the quiche and the rich, bold flavor of the coffee. I think you will enjoy them both.

If we were having coffee, I would confess that we should have had this coffee and conversation yesterday, but my internet was down most of the day. We had an arctic blast come through here with high winds and below zero windchill. The company that my wifi is through had promised to winter-proof their system before winter actually hit, but some of their ‘optics’ (their word, not mine) still isn’t winterized. After huge gustings of wind that lasted several hours overnight, I awoke to no wifi. I have no clue what they are doing. I never had these kinds of internet issues in OK no matter the weather (unless power went out). I think this is a young company and they are going through a learning curve. I just wish they’d get up to speed, but since they have a monopoly here, they don’t have to hurry. They know their customers have no choice but to put up with their BS.

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you how excited I am that 2017 is almost here. I’ve been working through writing projects for next year. I won’t make the same mistake I did this year. This year, I had planned major writing projects for every month except January. In the end, I only accomplished four projects. My big mistake was not giving myself time off and pressing myself to keep going. Along with some personal stuff, this resulted in a major depressive break. Next year, I plan on taking Jan, March, June, August, Oct, and Dec off from major projects. So hopefully by the end of next year, I will have completed six major projects. My plans include more Horror Tales in Feb, Poetry in April, StoryADay in May, a continuation of the Jack Diamond story titled Raised Stakes in July, a vampire story in September, and a completely new story for Nov’s NaNoWriMo (still working out what kind of story I want to write). I have three projects that I will be shelving until probably 2018 – Killer Tales (about serial killers that I began in June of this year and never completed), another addition to the Astraeus story and a project I began back in college in 1998 that I hope to complete this time. I have a huge list of writing projects that I want to complete, but I am realizing that I can’t do them all in one year.

If we were having coffee, I’d invite you to read my paranormal mystery, Seeing You. I’d planned to complete it for Nov’s NaNoWriMo, but I was plagued with illnesses all during November and I had to take some extra time to finish it. The last part will go live today around 2 or 3 pm EST. So if you haven’t read it yet, you will have time to catch up.

If we were having coffee, I would tell you that I am mostly well now. Just a small cough left, but the doc said my lungs are now clear. No more pneumonia. Now I am taking probiotics from all of the antibiotics I had to take to get well. If I hadn’t been so ill, I would have eaten yogurt while taking the antibiotics,  but I couldn’t stomach it.

And finally, if we were having coffee, what would you like to share with me? Leave me a comment. Tell me about your day. Share something fun that happened, or something not so fun. 

This delightful coffee share is brought to you by Part-Time Monster and friends.

The Daily Me (Journal) Goals – 12/02/2016

Today’s prompt comes from 100 Inspirational Journal Prompts by Melissa Bolton @ The Mogul Mom

And as from yesterday, this also comes from my death bed. Yes, I still feel like I am dying. And yes, I know that’s not true. So with what little time I am awake, I am trying to schedule a few of these ahead of time because I am taking a complete break from all of this over the weekend to hopefully heal. So onward to this prompt while my brain is semi-functioning….

A goal you’ve been putting off. What’s stopping you?

I have several writing goals that I keep putting on the back burner. One of them involves a vampire story that I eventually want to complete. It’s the story of a 600-year-old vampiress. Lots of intricate details need to be worked out, which means it will be tedious. I’ve been shelving it for years now.

Another writing goal is to edit two novellas, maybe put them on .pdf and make them available in their entirety as a book. Again, this would be tedious work and I would have to learn some technical stuff.

And my last writing goal is to finish the binders that contain some of my writing and include recent work from the last two years. More tedious work.

I keep shelving all of these because they require a lot of attention and painstaking busyness that I just don’t have the energy for these days. I think I need a secretary.

#WeekendCoffeeShare – 11/26/16


If we were having coffee, I would tell you that the last time I shared coffee with you, it was back in May. I was sick then and I am sick now, but this was also before The Big Crash. The Big Crash, as I’ve been calling it, happened in June. I’d been growing increasingly depressed for whatever reason (I still don’t know why) and kept trying to ignore it. By June 2nd, there was no way possible to ignore it any longer. I’d begun having thoughts of cutting and burning, and yes, even suicide. Just thoughts, no actions. Those dark voices were also back. I knew I needed help and I needed it fast, so I checked into a psych hospital for a while. I also got medicated again, which lasted five months. Yes, I’ve stopped taking the medicine, ignoring appointments to see the psych doc and therapist. They would be furious with me, but I cannot write while medicated and writing is what I do.

If we were having coffee, I would invite you into my sitting room, which is just a sectioned off area of my bedroom. There are two comfy chairs, shelves of books and a gas heater. It is warm and cozy, perfect for a chilly day like today. We’d have some choco-coffee (a mixture of coffee and hot chocolate) and cinnamon rolls with gooey icing. I made them for Thanksgiving and they still taste wonderful. Come, sit and share with me.

If we were having coffee, I would tell you about all the plans that got foiled this year. I wasted five months of writing projects. I’d had projects lined up from June through October, some fun ones too, but depression got in the way. I won’t call them failures, just wasted opportunities. I’ve shelved them until next year. I’ve learned that I can over-extend myself. I hadn’t scheduled in time-off. Something I will rectify next year.

If we were having coffee, I would tell you that since making a come-back in late October, I have been working on a novella for NaNoWriMo. It is titled, Seeing You, a paranormal mystery involving a witch and the FBI. I became sick two days into writing it and have been sick one way or another ever since. First it was the tummy flu that lasted almost a week. Now it is a serious cold, possibly flu that turned into bronchitis. I am still plodding along on it, even though I am a day behind and have been almost the entire month. I am not stressing though. If I hit the 50k mark on the 30th, so be it. If not, I will still finish the 50k words into December.

If we were having coffee, I would tell you how lovely Thanksgiving was this year. My brother did most of the cooking, as usual. We had turkey, mashed potatoes, green beans, stuffing and macaroni & cheese. Dessert consisted of homemade cinnamon rolls, pumpkin pie and apple crumble pie. With all of those carbs, I am going to have to do a serious cleansing diet in January because I know Christmas will be a near rinse and repeat. My niece showed up with her two daughters. It was lovely to spend a little time with them, even though I was sick. I adore Stormy, my niece, and her daughters, Skylar and Autumn. If I could afford it, I would spoil all three of them constantly.

And finally, if we were having coffee, I would invite you to tell me about your week. Did anything fun happen? Anything not so fun? Or just randomly okay? Regardless, I’d love to hear all about it. Share with me in comments.

This delightful coffee share is brought to you by Part-Time Monster and friends.



Monthly Wrap-Up: May 2016


May has been a rollercoaster of a ride for me. Allow me to share some of the twisty-turvy events with you…

I was ill for about 12 days (7 of those days were the worst) with a flu-like bug – fevers, chills, unable to keep food down, too many trips to the toilet, my head hung over a wastebasket, and extremely lethargic. Although I am able to eat solid food again, I am still quite lethargic. I only get the flu maybe once every couple of years and generally in winter, so this was quite a shock for me.

I’ve also been having a serious bout of depression for most of the month – partly due to a friendship I knew I had to end and eventually did end and partly because of being off of my low carb diet for most of April and May. Between the flu and my screwed up diet, my blood sugar has been all over the board (even taking my insulin), anywhere between 180 up to the 400s. High blood sugar readings also contribute to depression for me. When I had the flu, it was nothing for my bs readings to be in the 300s. Since I wasn’t eating, I didn’t feel safe taking as much insulin as I am supposed to take, so the numbers just ran rampant. It has taken me 3 days to get it out of the 300s without over-dosing on insulin (taking too much insulin makes me crave sweets and other carbs). The past two days, I have been back on my low carb diet and I can finally feel the depression lifting some.

And I’ve been having some internet issues that have driven me insane. My provider has been doing major upgrades to their wifi service which has been knocking me offline at random times during the day and night, often for hours at a time. They sent out a schedule of these ‘down times’ to people who receive a paper bill, but not to those of us who get the electronic bill. I had no idea why the ‘net kept going down and would spend hours on the telephone trying to get through, but since I didn’t know what was going on, I didn’t know they wouldn’t be answering the phones either. This oversight on their part kept me on the phone with them for nearly two hours one night (when they weren’t down) trying to get through to someone, anyone who had the time to read me the schedule. This occurred while I was ill, so my patience wore thin pretty quickly. There will still be updates randomly through June, but thankfully, they sent a schedule out to those of us who receive the electronic bill this time. So if you don’t see me around, it is probably because of the wifi upgrades.

I am a bit disappointed that I didn’t get to complete the StoryADay writing project. I did try to catch up with the story writing, but I finally resolved that those last seven stories would just go unwritten. I’m not looking at this as a failure though. I did what I could while I was well enough to write or had service to the ‘net. Time to sweep all of that out the door and look forward to June. I will be writing on my memoir and Serial Killer short stories, working on another addition to the Jack Diamond story, continue working with Keith Channing on the Zanzibar story and hopefully begin a project with my friend Raili. I’ve decided not to stress out over any of these projects this coming month. If I get all of it done, hurray! If not, so be it. I will fill you in on one thing – I will be taking the entire day off on Monday, June 20th. That will be my 50th birthday and I spend my birthdays doing my favorite things and that doesn’t include being online.

And now, because I feel a bit tired, I am going to go sit out on the front porch and watch the neighbor’s kids play catch and listen to the birds singing. See you all tomorrow.

10 Daily Currents – 05.09.16

It is Monday at 6:18 pm and I am currently…

1. listening: to dad watching the A-Team in the kitchen, the hum of my fan, birds singing outside, traffic on the road, kids’s laughter as they play outside

2. eating: scrambled eggs and sausage with salsa

3. drinking: coffee with cream and stevia

4. wearing: green t-shirt with Save Tibet printed on it, black pedal-pushers

5. feeling: a bit sluggish this evening… this gloomy weather is making me tired, a bit clogged up too. Forgot to take the vitamin C and pantothenic acid (B5) last night and just remembered a few minutes ago

6. weather: warmish, cloudy, gloomy, humid – about 75 degrees

7. wanting: chocolate… will be glad when Friday gets here and I can buy some

8. needing: to do more writing and read some others’ posts

9. thinking: do I  write or watch some mindless nothing on Netflix

10. enjoying: reading some of the A2Z Reflections posts

I had a thought, dear readers… if you’d like to grab these 10 Daily Currents and write your own, link back to my post so I can share along with you!

05.08.16 – End of Day Notes

What I did today:  Considerably less than I wanted to do. I am just not feeling that creative spark today. I think it has to do with this damn cycling shit. Admittedly, I’ve felt better today than the past three days, but I am still not 100% and it is reflected in my writing. As I glance at my to-do list, there are still 8 things on there that I want to do today, and that’s after removing a few things that I know I just won’t get done. I probably won’t get many more of those 8 done either. At least two of them I will try to do between now and whenever I decide to go to bed. The other 6 are fiction writing prompts. And since my fiction writing is suffering greatly at the moment, I just may not even consider them. There is always next week, right?

What I learned today:  I need to get back into meditation. I need to focus my mind since it is running rampant at the moment.

What I am most proud of today? I said I wasn’t going to do it until probably tomorrow, but I plugged my phone in early this morning. Annette needed me and she is a priority in my life. Because it was plugged in, I had a lovely chat with my friend Claire and she sent me some Reiki. But what I am most proud of is that my selfish friend also called and yes, I answered it. We talked for about 45 mins and it went well. I didn’t feel any wonkiness from talking to her, so I guess I am over whatever had me so irritated on Wednesday and Thursday.

What did you do today, dear readers? Learn any lessons? Have a reason to be proud? Share your thoughts with me in the comments!

New Project

It has taken me years to dig up the courage to embark on this new project. I cannot even begin to tell you how many times people have said to me, “You should write a memoir about your life.” I still cannot imagine why. I feel like my life has been relatively boring compared to many. Still, I suppose I have a few things about my life that may interest others.

So, beginning this upcoming Monday, May 9th, I will begin writing and posting pieces of my memoir here on this blog. The working title for it will be A Delicious Torment. Topics of interest will include my mental health issues, mainly that of having Borderline Personality Disorder, Bipolar Disorder and OCD, along with a few other issues such as my descent into madness and suicide attempts. I will also describe my life as a bisexual woman, my college days, and my marriage of 13 years. I am not sure how deep I will go into my childhood, but there will be some of that in there as well.

Hopefully, I will be able to write this without it sounding like one huge pity party. No one wants to read something like that. I haven’t yet decided if I will write it chronologically or in piecemeal. I guess it depends on how I feel each Monday. I intend to be completely honest in this project. Lies will be exposed and possibly some shocking truths will come to light.

05.05.16 – End of Day Notes

What I did today: As little as possible. I am not even sure what this day was all about. It’s been a dreary, cold, rainy day and my mood has matched it. I crawled in bed early this morning at around 3 am. Got back up at 5 am to turn on the beans that my brother wanted cooked for dinner today. Then crawled back into bed. As far as I know, I felt fine then, just extremely groggy. My friend (the selfish one I write about sometimes) called me at 9:30 this morning. I don’t usually get calls that early and definitely not from her. I answered because I was scared something was wrong. The phone ringing and the thought of something wrong immediately put me into panic mode. However, there was nothing wrong – she just wanted to chat because she was home alone as her parents had gone off somewhere without her and she couldn’t reach another friend on the phone. I don’t know if that set me off into a dark mood or not, but it did irritate me because of all the people in the world, she knows I have strange sleep schedules and I am not much of a morning person. She knows this dammit! She is my oldest friend and knows just about everything about me. She should have known better! The longer I sat there listening to her drone on and on about her life and not even apologizing for waking me, the darker I became. By the time we hung up 45 minutes later, I’d already descended into a deep funk. I tried to work on my writing projects since I was already up, but only managed to get the 366 thing and the small stones done. I resolved that I needed to be back in bed, so I did so. I slept until around 4 pm. I’ve now been up just over 5 hrs and my mood hasn’t lightened much. Somehow, I managed to write my story today (well, I know how… Annette lifted my spirits some), but I still feel odd, like my head is fuzzy. Not quite the same feeling I have with allergy attacks, but similar. As soon as I post this, I am going back to bed.

What I learned today: Did I learn anything at all? I just don’t know. I am trying to figure out what is causing me to feel so dark and gloomy lately because today was just another day in a long string of days where my mood has been darkened. I am wondering if it is my diet. I’ve gone back to eating carbohydrates now and again, probably too often. When I eat them, I rarely eat good fats or protein with them. All I want is the carbs (cookies, candy, potatoes, noodles, beans, bread). I will eat them over anything and then my blood sugar soars and my mood goes into the tank. It’s time I go back on my low carb diet full time and stop this on again off again shit.

What I am most proud of today? I didn’t lose my cool with my friend, even though I was horribly irritated. And until this mood lifts, I will just avoid her. So I’ve unplugged my phone for a few days. Hopefully if I change my diet back, I will be okay again by the beginning of next week.

What did you do today, dear readers? Learn any lessons? Have a reason to be proud? Share your thoughts with me in the comments!