What I did today: I slept in this morning, something I haven’t done in quite a while. I just kept hitting that snooze button over and over again. When I finally woke up fully, I had a sore throat and a coughing fit. Ugghhsss.. I have the crud that my sister brought into the house. Mine isn’t as severe (yet) as dad and brother’s is, but it’s there. I feel it. That meant going to the store and getting cold meds. Spent most of the afternoon catching up on my posts and trying to work on Andromeda Dreaming, but since I feel like crap, the creative flow just isn’t there. It will probably be some time tomorrow before I get the next part of my story finished. I am just too exhausted tonight to finish it.
What I learned today: I read a post over at Judie Sigdel’s blog about creating vision boards and I think I will give that a shot. It’s a good way to visually create intentions for the upcoming year.
What I am most proud of today? I didn’t panic while dad was driving today. He kept going over to the shoulder of the road and while it was scary, I didn’t lose it. I think he should have waited another day before driving after that over-medicated scare yesterday, but we made it to the next town and home again all in one piece.
What did you do today, dear readers? Learn any lessons? Have a reason to be proud? Share your thoughts with me in the comments!
It is Tuesday at 3:21 pm and I am currently…
1. listening: the hum of my fan
2. eating: nothing solid. Doing a cleansing fast
3. drinking: ice water and Earl Grey tea
4. wearing: red top, black slacks, black socks
5. feeling: a bit under the weather.. woke up with a cough and sore throat, now just having a sinus thing
6. weather: chilly, grey skies, expecting more rain later
7. wanting: some soup, but will settle for chicken broth in a while
8. needing: to work on my story, Andromeda Dreaming
9. thinking: looks like I may have caught that damn bug after all
10. enjoying: a spot of tea
Dear readers, if you’d like to join me with these 10 Dailies, snag them and link back to my blog so I can read your dailies.
I have to have order to simplify my life. That means a calendar so I can map out my days, weeks and months. I also need to keep notes. I have three notebooks. One for writing ideas, one for keeping track of my diet and health, and one for general notes to remind myself of things I need to do, like bills to pay, groceries, etc. Another of my tricks is to keep a timer nearby. If I have a lot of projects to work on, I will give myself an allotted period of time to work on them and the timer comes in handy. I’ve been using my timer a lot lately with reading. I have so many books to read and try to read at least two at a time. I give myself an hour on one and then an hour on another.
I often end up resenting myself for being so structured, but I know it is for my own good. If I didn’t have structure, my life would either be chaotic or I would just turn into a lazy slug. Sometimes, when I get off schedule (like today), I feel like such a failure, but I am trying to overcome that. It’s good to be structured and scheduled, but I also need to remind myself that I don’t need to have something planned for every minute of the day, that I need to leave room for life and randomness, and that sometimes I just need some ‘me’ time.
Today’s prompt comes via Writing Our Way Home, as part of the email section of the course Journaling Your Way Home. (Note: If you’d like to join in, you can purchase the course at the Journaling Your Way Home address above to receive both the e-book and the emails)
“Writing is an exploration. You start from nothing and learn as you go.”
~E. L. Doctorow
Start with a familiar memory. Re-enter it. Live it again. Let go into fantasy if you like. Go where the writing takes you.
You know how you can smell something and it takes you back in time to a memory? I did that this morning. I was refiling my humidifier and suddenly smelt salt water. It made no sense. There’s nothing salty about the mist from the humidifier, but there it was anyway. Salt water. My mind instantly drifted back in time to the mid-to-late 90s when I was attending Hollins College and my friend Claire and I would take Spring Break trips to Nags Head. Suddenly, I was there again – walking along the sandy shore, listening to the Ocean breathing, and feeling the cool salt water on my face. I felt her calling me, enticing me to join her, to be one with her. She has that effect on me, lulling me into a state of complete bliss.
I am pulled into her foam-green petticoats, swirling around with her, allowing myself to drift further out and under. I feel the pressure as she gently coaxes me to go deeper and deeper. I want to be with her. To become her. To be inexplicably one with her and never resurface. I don’t worry that I am made of flesh and blood. I am also made of water and can, therefore, become water. I watch as schools of fish swim by. They are as curious of me as I am of them. What is a human doing so deep? Is she out of her mind? Surely she will drown, or perhaps she will adapt. I’d like to adapt, grow my own gills so I never have to leave this place. Then I could not only be one with the Ocean, but also one with the dolphins, whales and sharks.
In the distance, I hear a raven cawing and am lifted from the sea. There is a war going on inside of me. A battle between the call of the Ocean and the call of the Raven. To be deep in the sea, or soaring through the air. I want to be with both, but I know that I cannot. I realize it is my dual nature as part Gemini and part Cancer, a cuspie. To be of Air and Water. In my mind, I return to my mountains feeling wholly unsatisfied and wanting.
01/03/17 – Nine of Swords
You are agonizing over something. For whatever reason you are working through this alone, even though help is nearby. Reach out and allow someone to guide and comfort you.
Be aware of isolation. You may feel like you’re alone or your pride may stop you from reaching out. You’re not alone and your pride may cost you more than you know.
Pondersome, Tarot. My only agony at the moment is my health, and yes, it is troubling me something fierce, especially when I see how far down the same problem has dragged my dad. I won’t go back to the doc though. He will just put me back on insulin. While it will bring my blood sugar down to acceptable levels, it also makes me gain weight and then I have the doc harping at me that I need to lose weight. So I will deal with this on my own by fasting periodically and leaving the carbs alone. I’m not really so isolated though. I have a Facebook support group to fall back on. I just have to engage with them.