The Sandbox Writing Challenge #11 — What fascinates you?


What fascinates you?

There are a lot of things that fascinate me because I have an inquisitive nature. Here is a small list:

  • birds soaring
  • insects
  • lizards
  • cats
  • science
  • maths
  • different cultures
  • Russian history
  • ancient sites
  • aliens
  • archaeology
  • serial killers
  • Hitler and the Holocaust
  • the flicker of a candle’s flame
  • storms
  • plants growing
  • my own bones and veins
  • classical music
  • ballerinas
  • abstract art
  • the ocean
  • whales and dolphins
  • mythology
  • world religions and spiritual paths
  • my own existence

I know there are more, but I am sure you get enough of a picture here to see how weird and quirky I am.


The Daily Me (Journal) Judgement II – 12/30/16

Today’s prompt comes from 100 Inspirational Journal Prompts by Melissa Bolton @ The Mogul Mom

What characteristics do you judge the most harshly in yourself?

Oh goodness, where to start? I probably have more bad characteristics than good ones.

One that I judge myself harshly over is my ‘supposed’ selfish nature. I don’t mean to be a ‘me first’ person, but I know I come across as such. You see, it is not intentional. I get hyper-focused on whatever I am doing to the exclusion of everything around me (remember dear Tarot cautioned me about that just a day or so ago) and when I get that focused, I tend to forget about family and friends and other commitments I may have made. This makes me look like a selfish jerk and I get called that (and worse) quite often.

Another one that I judge harshly about myself is my forgetfulness. I really do have memory issues and if I forget to write myself notes, I will forget to do things. This usually ends up disappointing someone and they get upset with me and I, in turn, get upset with myself. Vicious, nasty cycle.

I can also come across as haughty and snobbish, even though I don’t mean to act that way. I just live in my head a lot and cherish the intellect. All else seems rather tedious and boring to me. But when people point out those characteristics to me, I berate myself and tell myself to act like the average people more often. It is exhausting.

And finally, I judge myself most critically for procrastinating. It sucks the marrow from my bones and causes me a lot of stress because I suffer from OCD and putting things off is just not productive for me. And yet, I do it to the point of driving myself mad.

My Daily Tarot – Knight of Pentacles


12/30/16 – Knight of Pentacles

You have fought some battles and enjoyed some adventures. Now you’d like to rest and regroup, maybe spend some time enjoying quieter, more domestic scenes. Take some time off and make yourself feel safe, if necessary. You may need to adopt a protective or defensive stance.

Be aware of resting on your laurels or stagnating. If you had a traumatic experience, do not let it paralyze you or become an excuse for not moving forward.

Have you been time traveling, dear Tarot? It feels like you’ve jumped back in time and dug up all the nasties and besties of my life. Yes, I’ve fought many battles and had a few adventures along the way and now, I have settled back down in my childhood home nestled in the mountains of Virginia. I’ve literally digressed to find that safety, peace and rest I’ve needed for so long.

Yet, it has been two years now and perhaps I have become stagnated. It was a traumatic experience this last time. I lived with a narcissist for 13 years, survived cancer and seven suicide attempts. I am very guarded about my life now. I am just not sure why you are bringing this all up again, dear Tarot. Is it because of the new journeys I am about to embark upon? Are you cautioning me? I promise. I will be very careful and remember to take some time to rest.

As 2016 comes to a close…

Well, here it is, the end of another year. For the past three years, I have chosen words to focus on in an attempt to expand my spirit and grow. In 2014, I chose Acceptance. In 2015, my choice was Gratitude. I had great success with both of those words. My spirit grew and I overcame a lot of adversary.

For 2016, I chose Abundance. I thought, how can I go wrong with something so beautiful? Well, the Universe has a way of laughing in my face sometimes. Oh, you want abundance? Are you sure? Fine, you asked for it! And boy did I ever get it. I forgot about an important rule – be careful what you ask for, especially if you aren’t specific enough.

The year began okay. I set goals for writing projects and didn’t really foresee problems completing them. But then I took on too many side projects because well, the Universe directed people to me who wanted to push my writing skills into other directions and I accepted this because that’s what I said I would do. Then I allowed myself to get bogged down in other people’s issues, figuring that the Universe had brought these things to me in an abundant way so that I could act as a guide or peace keeper. Boy was I wrong! These people didn’t want my help, they just wanted attention. In the end, I became anxious, panicky, and depressed. The depression grew, abundantly. I became ill over and over again, abundantly. I nearly lost my mind and was hospitalized. What suffered the most? My writing projects, in great abundance. From June until late September, I withdrew from the world. I wanted nothing more to do with Abundance. And even when I made a come-back in October, I’ve still struggled with my health, mental health, and some residual abundant effects.

So what’s my take-away from a year of Abundance? It can be both beautiful and brutal. Sometimes less really is more. I am now perfectly content with as little of everything as possible.

I actually thought about not bothering with a word for this year. I had two great successes and one huge failure. I thought, do I really want to put myself through this again? I finally decided that I would go for it one more year.

So, my word for 2017 is ENGAGE. You are probably wondering why I’ve chosen such a word. Well, for the last couple of years, I’ve had long periods where I have disengaged from the world, cut myself off from people, and not interacted with others like I should. I also support a few important causes which may be under jeopardy in the next four years, and I want to become engaged in those as well. And so, as I move forward into the uncertainty of 2017, it is my desire to engage once more with the outside world, with friends at home and on the internet, to interact with writers and artists, and throw my support behind causes that are important to me. As an introvert, I am pushing myself way out of my comfort zone. May the Universe have mercy on all of us *laughs*