If we were having coffee, I would tell you that the last time I shared coffee with you, it was back in May. I was sick then and I am sick now, but this was also before The Big Crash. The Big Crash, as I’ve been calling it, happened in June. I’d been growing increasingly depressed for whatever reason (I still don’t know why) and kept trying to ignore it. By June 2nd, there was no way possible to ignore it any longer. I’d begun having thoughts of cutting and burning, and yes, even suicide. Just thoughts, no actions. Those dark voices were also back. I knew I needed help and I needed it fast, so I checked into a psych hospital for a while. I also got medicated again, which lasted five months. Yes, I’ve stopped taking the medicine, ignoring appointments to see the psych doc and therapist. They would be furious with me, but I cannot write while medicated and writing is what I do.
If we were having coffee, I would invite you into my sitting room, which is just a sectioned off area of my bedroom. There are two comfy chairs, shelves of books and a gas heater. It is warm and cozy, perfect for a chilly day like today. We’d have some choco-coffee (a mixture of coffee and hot chocolate) and cinnamon rolls with gooey icing. I made them for Thanksgiving and they still taste wonderful. Come, sit and share with me.
If we were having coffee, I would tell you about all the plans that got foiled this year. I wasted five months of writing projects. I’d had projects lined up from June through October, some fun ones too, but depression got in the way. I won’t call them failures, just wasted opportunities. I’ve shelved them until next year. I’ve learned that I can over-extend myself. I hadn’t scheduled in time-off. Something I will rectify next year.
If we were having coffee, I would tell you that since making a come-back in late October, I have been working on a novella for NaNoWriMo. It is titled, Seeing You, a paranormal mystery involving a witch and the FBI. I became sick two days into writing it and have been sick one way or another ever since. First it was the tummy flu that lasted almost a week. Now it is a serious cold, possibly flu that turned into bronchitis. I am still plodding along on it, even though I am a day behind and have been almost the entire month. I am not stressing though. If I hit the 50k mark on the 30th, so be it. If not, I will still finish the 50k words into December.
If we were having coffee, I would tell you how lovely Thanksgiving was this year. My brother did most of the cooking, as usual. We had turkey, mashed potatoes, green beans, stuffing and macaroni & cheese. Dessert consisted of homemade cinnamon rolls, pumpkin pie and apple crumble pie. With all of those carbs, I am going to have to do a serious cleansing diet in January because I know Christmas will be a near rinse and repeat. My niece showed up with her two daughters. It was lovely to spend a little time with them, even though I was sick. I adore Stormy, my niece, and her daughters, Skylar and Autumn. If I could afford it, I would spoil all three of them constantly.
And finally, if we were having coffee, I would invite you to tell me about your week. Did anything fun happen? Anything not so fun? Or just randomly okay? Regardless, I’d love to hear all about it. Share with me in comments.