The Sandbox Writing Challenge #52 — Finding My Way

It’s early Saturday morning and while I’d rather be snuggled in bed in a Nyquil-infused comatose state, I am instead up and wide awake. What better way to spend my sleepless time than by answering more of Calen’s questions, and believe me, the following two questions have forced me to put my thinking cap on.

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Where are you going? 
Where would you like to be in five years?

At the moment, I am still comfortably stuck in limbo in my small home town in Virginia. I have expressed the desire to move back to my beloved Roanoke (45 minutes away), but for the foreseeable future, I just don’t see that happening. The biggest issues are my health and finances.  My only option to get back to Roanoke would be to move in with a long-time friend, but I am not sure I could financially afford that. And then there is my health, which is deteriorating rapidly these days and I wouldn’t want to become a burden on a friend. I have another long-term option involving living on another long-time friend’s land, but that is still in the early planning stage and may never even come to fruition. So for now, I am going nowhere.

In five years… I would love to be living in a beach house in Maine somewhere, but realistically, I will be 55. My health may or may not have improved. My finances will definitely not have improved, unless I can begin making a living off of my writing, but after talking to a lot of independent authors, I don’t see that happening. So in five years, I may or may not be just where I am, or I may or may not be living in Roanoke or on my other friend’s land. I will still be writing. I definitely know that. I am leaving the door to possibilities open. What comes will come. For now, I will just focus on the here and now. One day at a time. One step at a time.

Inspired! – 11/05/16 #NaBloPoMo #CheerPeppers

The Invitation

By Oriah Mountain Dreamer

It doesn’t interest me
what you do for a living.
I want to know
what you ache for
and if you dare to dream
of meeting your heart’s longing.

It doesn’t interest me
how old you are.
I want to know
if you will risk
looking like a fool
for love
for your dream
for the adventure of being alive.

It doesnt interest me
what planets are
squaring your moon…
I want to know
if you have touched
the centre of your own sorrow
if have been opened
by life’s betrayals
or have become shrivelled and closed
from fear of further pain.

I want to know
if you can sit with pain
mine or your own
without moving to hide it
or fade it
or fix it.

I want to know
if you can be with joy
mine or your own
if you can dance with wildness
and let the ecstasy fill you
to the tips of your fingers and toes
without cautioning us
to be careful
to be realistic
to remember the limitations
of being human.

It doesn’t interest me
if the story you are telling me
is true.
I want to know if you can
disappoint another
to be true to yourself.
If you can bear
the accusation of betrayal
and not betray your own soul.
If you can be faithless
and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see Beauty
even when it is not pretty
every day.
And if you can source your own life
from its presence.

I want to know
if you can live with failure
yours and mine
and still stand at the edge of the lake
and shout to the silver of the full moon,
“Yes.”

It doesn’t interest me
to know where you live
or how much money you have.
I want to know if you can get up
after the night of grief and despair
weary and bruised to the bone
and do what needs to be done
to feed the children.

It doesn’t interest me
who you know
or how you came to be here.
I want to know if you will stand
in the centre of the fire
with me
and not shrink back.

It doesn’t interest me
where or what or with whom
you have studied.
I want to know
what sustains you
from the inside
when all else falls away.

I want to know
if you can be alone
with yourself
and if you truly like
the company you keep
in the empty moments.

“This poem is an excerpt from the book, “The Invitation (1999)”, by Oriah Mountain Dreamer. Oriah is a spiritual counselor and story teller among other things. This poem offers an invitation to every single one of us to “show up” in the universe. She reminds us that we do not serve the universe by being small. Rather, we serve the universe by making the most out of our lives.”

Source: http://www.familyfriendpoems.com/poem/the-invitation-by-oriah-mountain-dreamer

How does this poem make you feel, dear readers? Do you find it inspiring? Does it make you want to ‘show up’? Let’s discuss it in comments.


Linking up with Nano Poblano

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