03.31.16 – End of Day Notes

What I did today: I did some writing projects in the wee hours of the night and then around 10 am, I crashed and burned. I was supposed to go to the store with my dad, but I couldn’t get awake. I felt drugged and couldn’t focus my eyes. Even after waking up around 4 pm, it was hard to get focused. My brain didn’t want to wake up and my eyes were blurry. It has taken many cups of coffee just to get to the point of concentration.

What I learned today: staying awake for 24 hrs is not a good thing. I keep forgetting that I am older now and cannot maintain those long days anymore.

What I am most proud of today:  I completed my 31-part Noir-style WhoDunIt and was very satisfied with the results. It came in at just a couple of hundred words shy of 35k, my second longest writing project. Now I just hope I can maintain that momentum with the 26 science fiction stories I plan to write for the A2Z over at Promptly Written. I’ve also written and scheduled ALL of my posts for this blog for the A2Z. I am so excited. April will be loads of fun for me.

What did you do today, dear readers? Learn any lessons? Have a reason to be proud? Share your thoughts with me in the comments!

10 Daily Currents – 03.31.16

It is Thursday at 5:36 pm and I am currently…

1. listening: traffic outside, a neighbor’s dog barking

2. eating: hamburger pattie, asparagus spears

3. drinking: ice water

4. wearing: black pants, red t-shirt, black socks

5. feeling: tired, eyes blurry – otherwise quite satisfied that I completed my month of writing

6. weather: cool & windy, about 60 degrees… a storm is headed this way.. grey sky

7. wanting: my eyes to clear so I can see to write

8. needing: to defog my brain

9. thinking: maybe I should make a pot of coffee.. it’s going to be a long night

10. enjoying: talking to friends

I had a thought, dear readers… if you’d like to grab these 10 Daily Currents and write your own, link back to my post so I can share along with you!

April on As The Fates Would Have It

April is going to be a very busy month for me. I hope you will join me!

Here at As the Fates Will Have It, I will be writing about People Who Inspire Me for the A2Z and participating in the NaJoWriMo.

Over at  A Whispered Wind, I will post “small stones” daily and try to reblog as often as possible. Hump Day Poetry will also post each Wednesday! I may even posts some of my archived poems and stories occasionally. If you aren’t already following me there, you may want to consider doing so to keep up with the “small stones” and Hump Day Poetry!

And over at Promptly Written, things will be very very busy! I will be writing 26 original Science Fiction stories for the A2Z and 30 new poems for the April PAD Challenge (and maybe more as I also joined the NaPoWriMo!). If you are not following me there, you may want to considering doing so now so you won’t miss any of these exciting stories and poems.

See you tomorrow!

 

03.30.16 – End of Day Notes

What I did today: I’ve mostly been trying to recover from yesterday. I was so exhausted last night that I didn’t even post my notes here. I’ve done a little bit of writing today, mostly on my A2Z posts for this blog. I am still exhausted and will probably be headed off to bed soon.

What I learned today: Oneness and unity are so powerful

What I am most proud of today:  Although I am exhausted, I’ve managed to stay awake all day. Hopefully that means I will sleep tonight.

What did you do today, dear readers? Learn any lessons? Have a reason to be proud? Share your thoughts with me in the comments!

Silent No More – Full Blown Rant

I’ve about had enough of this misogynistic, egotistical, bigoted, racist, jackass Trump! I try not to get into politics, but he has gone overboard now. In this article, Trump says that not only should abortion be banned, but women should be punished for aborting. Not the doctors who perform it. Not the men who cause the women to get pregnant (if it is the case of rape or incest). No, just the women.

First let me state my stance on abortion. I am pro-choice and I will not apologize for that stance. I do not believe it should be used as a means for birth control because face it, it is a poor and expensive means of doing so when birth control devices are available. I do believe it should be used in instances of rape and incest. But you cannot allow it for some and not for others because that would force women to prove they were victims of rape or incest and it is hard enough to prove those things without needing government approval to have an abortion just for those instances. It’s a choice. If you don’t want to make that choice, no one is pointing a gun at your head to make you do so. Hence, I am pro-choice.

But who does that jackass want to punish? Women. In instances of rape or incest, it is NOT the woman’s fault if she gets pregnant. Why should she be forced to carry a baby to term when she is already traumatized by the rape or incest? And then to punish her? That jackass has gone too far.

I’ve said it a million times, if men could get pregnant, abortion would not only be legal, it would be their RIGHT and never questioned again.

Sorry readers, I am turning comments off because I do not wish to get into a debate about pro-choice vs. pro-life. Everyone has the right to take whichever stance they wish.

Wednesday Hodgepodge – 03.30.16

for Wednesday Hodgepodge @ From This Side of the Pond

1. What are two or three expectations you have of yourself?

To remain mindful and stay in the here and now. To stick to my writing schedules. And to stay in touch with others. The last one is the hardest to fulfill because when I am writing, I forget that others exist.

2.  In what way does your outdoor space need sprucing up this spring?

It could use some flowers, but we have a huge maple tree that prevents too much sunlight from getting around, so they would have to be plants that can thrive in the shade. I would also like to put some potted plants out there. Need to scrub the front porch and get it ready for outdoor seating.

3.  According to this site (Roadtrippers), six of North America’s most wondrous waterfalls are-Webster’s Falls in Ontario, Upper Whitewater Falls in North Carolina, Havasu Falls in the Grand Canyon, Multnomah Falls in Oregon, The Lower Yellowstone Falls, and Niagara. Have you seen any on the list? Which one on the list would you most like to visit? Prettiest waterfall not on the list that you’ve seen in person?

I’ve never seen any of those waterfalls, but I would love to see all of them. The prettiest I’ve seen is in Falling Springs, Virginia

4.  Looking back, what’s something you wish you’d done as a teenager?

Been more adventurous. I was a quiet bookworm and rarely ventured out to do anything adventurous or sporty. I would have loved to mountain climb or maybe hang gliding, or perhaps learned to ski.

5. Ham…yes please or no thank you? If you said yes please which of the following do you like best-baked ham with all the trimmings, a ham and cheese sandwich, prosciutto with melon, a ham biscuit, a bowl of split pea and ham soup, or a slice of pizza topped with ham and pineapple?

the baked ham with all the trimmings… yum!

6. Are you typical of your generation? How so?

According to this site, I am of the Generation X group. I guess I am typical of some of the things listed there. I am an individual, distrust government and Big Business, self-reliant, believe we are all one, and I definitely feel misunderstood by other generations. But I was not typical of my peers. I was always different and will probably always be different. I also related better to older and younger generations than those in my own.

7. April rolls in at the end of the week, and in keeping with that theme…’act the fool’, nobody’s fool’, a fool’s errand’, ‘could have fooled me’…which foolish idiom most recently applies to you? Explain.

Could have fooled me… I say this constantly to one of my friends. She constantly says things that are contradictory to what I know about her or what she feels or means.

8.  Insert your own random thought here.

I should be working on my A2Z posts instead of doing all of these challenges.

The Sandbox Writing Challenge #33 — Hunger

Calen’s question this week really puts things into perspective for me. This should be an interesting write.

What do you hunger for?

Foremost, I hunger for understanding. I’ve never cared if someone accepted me or not. I didn’t care if they liked the way I dressed or how I lived my life. I was going to do things my way, regardless. And for most of my life, I did just that. But I’ve always craved understanding. You don’t have to accept me as is, but at least understand why I am the way I am. Take the time to get to know my story, to understand why I am such a loner, why I enjoy my own company, why I wear dark clothing and make-up (though not as often as I once did), why I would rather spend a day writing or researching than with you chatting about things that only interest you. You see, I am quiet and reserved, a bookworm and nerd, I value intellect and knowledge above all things. Yes I am strange, odd, eccentric and quirky. But did you take the time to understand those things about me?

I also hunger for the written word. I am a bibliophile and collector of words. I read constantly and I write just as often. I love the meanings of words, where they came from, how they were first used. I love how they form sentences and paragraphs and books. I love writing them and saying them out loud. And I can express myself better through writing than orally.

I also hunger for solace. For peaceful moments where nothing affects me. To be taken away from life’s bitter pill and just BE. Meditation often gets me there, but sometimes I must withdraw from the world, hide in a cocoon of my own making, regroup, recharge, and rejuvenated.

And finally, I hunger for darkness. It’s not what you think. I don’t want to be evil or monstrous. I want to understand the darkness so that I will know light when I see it. But in that hunger for darkness, I do enjoy dark music, literature, poetry, movies and real life dark moments. Maybe I am trying to understand my own dark psyche or that of those who do relish in evil and monstrous things.

How about you, dear readers? What do you hunger for? Share your thoughts with me in comments.

Creative Questions 6 – Courage

I’ve been joining calmkate @ Aroused for her Creative Questions Challenge by answering each of her 6 current questions. This is the last one and she promises something special for April that I cannot wait to see!

CQ6: Write about a moment of courage when you stood up for yourself!

If you’ve ever dealt with depression, then you know how it is a cruel monster that steals away your self-esteem, self-worth, and self-respect. It can also make you a sniveling shell of your former self. Add to that a life with a Narcissist who loves to take advantage of you when you are that shell and you have someone devoid of courage. This was me for the better part of nine years.

Since I was so depressed, I couldn’t handle conflict of any kind. I would agree to things just to keep from arguing over them. My ex husband knew this about me and would make demands on me that were not in my best interest. I couldn’t find the courage to tell him no. I couldn’t even find the courage to live most of the time.

And then two remarkable things happened almost simultaneously: I had uterine cancer and learned Mindfulness. The cancer gave me the courage to live. The Mindfulness gave me the courage to stand up for myself by teaching me to deal with my depression. Suddenly, I wasn’t that sniveling shell anymore. I was not so apt to say yes just to get along anymore. I began saying no. No to sex when I was sick. No to working on a dead-end marriage. And no to sticking around just because he couldn’t live alone with his own self.

The day I told him I was leaving him and moving back to Virginia was my greatest courageous moment. I didn’t pay attention to his pleads. I didn’t go along to get along. And I didn’t let his needs overshadow my own. I made my plans and carried them out. It was the most rewarding moment of my life.

How about you, dear readers? What was your moment of courage? Share your thoughts with me in comments.

Creative Questions 5 – Cheer

I’ve decided to take calmkate @ Aroused up on her Creative Questions Challenge by answering each of her 6 current questions over the next few days.

CQ5: What cheers you up – what brings a smile to your dial, a skip to your step, makes life seem more worthwhile?

It may seem odd, but normal cheery things do not cheer me up. Okay, I should redefine that. Some normal things do not cheer me up. I will admit that a gorgeous sunrise or sunset will put me in a state of awe, but is that cheerful? I am not sure. I will also admit that listening to birds singing, especially the cawing of ravens will make me stop, think, reflect. What I call “gap” moments, but is that cheerful? I am not sure of that either. Laughter will make me stop and smile, especially genuine deep belly laughs. I suppose that is cheery enough. And talking with old and new friends will bring me a moment of joy, so I guess that is cheery too.

However, if I am down and depressed or just sad or lonely, dark things really seem to lift my spirits. See, I told you it was odd! Certain dark music, like that of Linkin Park, Type O Negative, and a few others will lift me quicker than anything. Reading horror or watching documentaries on Serial Killers will bring me out of a slump. Reading or writing dark poetry also cheers me up. Wearing dark colors, usually black, crimson red, or a deep purple can bring me from depressed to happy in a nanosecond.

How about you, dear readers? What cheers you up? Share your thoughts with me in comments.

10 Daily Currents – 03.30.16

It is Wednesday at 7:51 am and I am currently…

1. listening: smooth jazz on Youtube

2. eating: scrambled eggs, bacon, an avocado

3. drinking: coffee with cream and stevia

4. wearing: blue sweats, a green t-shirt with “Save Tibet” on it and a pair of yellow socks

5. feeling: drained.. completely drained, like a soul-sucking monster has attacked me. Actually it isn’t far from the truth. Spent the day with a friend yesterday. I love her dearly, but she just saps me of energy

6. weather: cool, about 45 degrees… sun has shown its face, but it hasn’t warmed up any yet.

7. wanting: to wake up and somehow muster an unfoggy brain

8. needing: to get my A2Z stuff wrapped up for next month

9. thinking: I need a giant cup to put coffee in today

10. enjoying: the silence of early morning, the jazz in my ears and the comfort of friendship – nice to know I am missed when not around.

I had a thought, dear readers… if you’d like to grab these 10 Daily Currents and write your own, link back to my post so I can share along with you!